"Please Don't Tell Joan": Manager's Faustian Bargain with Sun God Results in First Place, Profound Spiritual Crisis
Montpelier Man Puts Penix in Superflex Position
Man In Shower stuns 11 Fully-Clothed Opponents
Man Beats Wife, Declares Himself 3-Peat Champion, Vows to Become "Quadrepeater" with Full Backing of Scientific Institute
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